What is Coaching?

"Coaching is like therapy, right?"

“I read a lot. What can a coach give me that I can't do alone?"

“My boss is happy with my performance. Why would I work with a coach?”

While the profession of coaching is growing rapidly, the definition of professional coaching is not widely understood outside professional athletics and executive suites.

And this includes clarifying how coaching differs from therapy. Although both practices are grounded in science, use evidence-based approaches and methods, they also have key differences.

Here’s a bit of context to help clear the air.

Coaching Isn’t Just for Athletes

Professional athletes. Industry leaders. C suite executives. All of these groups routinely engage in coaching. Why? Shouldn’t these exceptional individuals know how to handle their roles and challenges?

Yes. And they believe that growth never ends.

Top leaders and NBA All Stars work with coaches because it’s a powerful practice for managing and creating change. Change in ourselves, our teams, and organizations.

No doubt, high achievers have a formula that works. We exert ourselves, we labor long hours, we wrangle and summit big mountains. Getting a coach isn’t corrective, it’s about expanding our potential.

Everyone can self-sabotage. Procrastinate. Prioritize small tasks ahead of big plans. Our minds are powerful and without training, they have one goal: Keep us safe.

Coaching helps us see our unconscious patterns and blind spots and step around them.

Read self-help and professional development books--I have a massive library myself!--to your heart's content, listen to podcasts and webinars.

But if you want lasting and powerful growth—get yourself a coach.

Professional Coaching is Collaborative

Professional coaching is a partnership where you’re the expert on your life. Your coach’s role is listening deeply and seeking to understand. Another is asking amazing questions. The best coaches prompt you to consider old challenges in new ways.

Not everyone wants to be a team captain, write a bestseller or fly to the moon. Partnering with your coach, you define the roles and desires that are exquisitely appealing. What does “living your best life” look like for you?

Be warned, we're harnessing your imagination and your heart, but this is no vacay: Your coach can and will challenge you.

Self-limiting thoughts are to our minds what high fructose corn syrup is to our bodies—junk! So expect your coach to call these out and invite you to think differently.

She’ll also help you to identify and box in the inner doubter, imposter, personal critic and the chorus of internal naysayers so you're in control and driving your life.

The Outcome Drives your Coaching

I often get the question: What’s the difference between career coaching and life coaching? Health and relationship coaching? My reply--What’s the outcome you want to achieve?

Coaches may specialize because they have a passion for more general coaching (life) or unlocking the blocks to negotiating your dream salary (career).

However, I’ve found that subject specialization is not nearly as important as coaching experience. Working with a great coach means you will start out focusing in one arena, but your actions and shifting perceptions will have impact across your life.

We’re not single faceted people. When you start showing up differently at work, you’ll see positive changes at home, too. It just depends on where you want to start.

Much of coaching “fit” comes down to how you feel with a single coach. Is there rapport? Trust? Read on for more guidance.

Coaching is NOT therapy

This is important.

If you’re suffering from trauma, have unhealed wounds or addictions, seek out a licensed therapist. Therapy can help you reflect on the past and find new ways to address anxiety, depression or other diagnosable conditions.

If you’re ready to embrace change today to arrive in a new place tomorrow—coaching can be an excellent tool. It’s forward-facing, empowered and inspiring.

And change isn’t dependent on the size of your step. Even small shifts in the present can create new possibilities.

In contrast to therapy, a great coach won’t let ask you to linger on stories from years earlier. They’ll prompt you to grab the gold—what’s the lesson?—and turn back to today.

Professional coaching is not about endless pondering. It’s about action. A coach will challenge you to step up and get uncomfortable. “Being realistic” is NOT in the job description of your coach, either. Their role is holding space for infinite possibilities.

A great coach is one who encourages you to think more expansively.

Coaches ask: “What else is possible?” And from this little question, so much can sprout. They can help you define “what else” and then take targeted action.

Professional Coaches are Diverse

Coaches can differ widely in their approaches, personal qualities and work styles. For this reason, it’s best to ask for a consultation that includes a sample session. Look for strong rapport, trust and confidence in your coach. Expect to be deeply heard.

Then listen to your instincts. How did you feel interacting with them? Did their questions provoke deeper thoughts? Did you appreciate their enthusiasm, directness or calm? Were they a coach whose background mirrors your own? Would you be most at ease with a coach your age? One who’s fluent in your first language? These qualities matter.

“Fit” is a nuanced term for coach-client compatibility. Seek out the combination that feels most comfortable for you.

If you need help, reach back. I have a growing network of expert coaching colleagues and one referral may be all that’s needed.

Coaching can be the pathway to inner growth, new self-awareness or massive transformation. You get to define where it takes you. Curious and want to learn more? Let’s talk.